OMFG you guys I can’t believe I haven’t posted this gem yet! This exchange of emails with this major NOOB is what actually inspired me to start the NOOB FILES.
I swear this is all true. I know it seems way too idiotic to be true, but sadly, it’s all copied verbatim from my email. Yeah, I was pretty amazed myself.
Let me just start this story off by giving you guys some back story: I recently joined a website for photographers and models to exchange ideas, post their work, etc. I had been going back and forth with someone who I did my homework on and I knew he was a “real” aka professional photographer. We were in the middle of setting up a specific time/place to shoot, and I gave him my yahoo email to contact me on. SO when I got THIS email, I assumed it was THAT GUY. Normally I get emails like this on a pretty normal basis and I just delete them, but in my defense, I thought I was talking with someone else!:)
I absolutely love your look. I just finished reading your profile and am really interested in figuring out a way to do a shoot with you. I’m just starting to build a portfolio in this genre since photography has been a hobby of mine but I want to take it to the next level. I’ve got two shoots currently scheduled. The type of shoots I’m starting to do are like the MetArt, Maxim style, but I’ve got some of my own preferences from that. I will say that you have some of the greatest curves and that’s my weakness. Plus you have one of the most genuinely nice faces I’ve ever seen… I’ve just got to believe you are a genuinely nice person. I’m trying right now to meet good people that I can work with. Even if you and I can’t get it worked out, maybe you can refer me on to some others that could.
Since you like strong shoulders… here’s a few pics of me. I’m a genuinely nice guy who loves to kiss… that part of your profile struck a cord with me. Hope to hear back from you soon. Hope you like the pics…
<attached are 5 pics of him, from his naked chest, him flexing his arms, and his penis! Yup, he asks me to work with him, refer him to my other model friends, and then sends me a cock pic! WOW!>
WTF is wrong with you? I would never work with a photographer that sends me naked pics of himself.. that’s really not professional!
God I feel really bad about this… I can’t say sorry enough. I really am a nice guy and I want to do this professionally. I have a partner and we are setting the business up now. I can see how I shouldn’t have sent you those pics. It’s not like I thought in any way I had some kind of “chance” with you and I definitely didn’t send them for that reason. I did really like what your profile mentioned and it came across as you being just a genuinely nice person, which struck a chord with me. We are starting to put together content for the site and what we are looking for is artistic explicit nude. No penetration, toys, nothing like that. As I said, we are going for the femjoy, metart kind of style, though we do have a few differences. So far we have worked with two models… nothing but professional.
Anyway, I’m really sorry.
LOL again! If you were a good guy, you wouldn’t have to go around telling people “I really am a good guy” I have a feeling your shoot will be NOTHING like a professional, Maxim, Met-Art style shoot. You sent me cock pics dude. Then you use my bio as a reason for thinking I’d enjoy getting naked pics along with a business discussion? (which bio, the one on my porn website? Because my modeling bio on <website> for photographers says nothing about my sexual preferences, why would I discuss that with photographer, people I’m looking to do genuine business with?)
Also, who are the 2 models you have worked with? I’d like to ask them how professional your photoshoots were. I am getting the feeling that you don’t even know the definition of the word?
The fact that I have to explain any of this to you just proves to me that you don’t GET IT and you’re not just wasting my time, another creeper on the internet.. I will however make the most of our little exchange, I think I’m gna post this on my blog so me and my friends can all have a good laugh at you!;) And so other models are warned about you. This is NOT cool!
Go ahead, post your blog I don’t mind. Again I am really sorry and I just…
he goes on to tell me how professional he is and how his shoots are so blah blah blaaaa…
WHAT A JOKE
I mean, I get why random noobs send me cock pics, but a photographer? Can you imagine interviewing someone for a job and having them just sneak into the conversation about “how much they like to kiss and BTW here’s my junk” LOL!
I think this guy just earned the title of HEAD DOUCHE..
Biggest. Noob. Ever!
Aaliyah Love XOXO <3